There's a monkey
Sittin' in my family tree
Up near the top
Where everyone can see
And people keep sayin'
How he looks like me
So ask him politely,
"Dear Mr Monkey,
Could you please come down
From the family tree"

There's a monkey
Sittin' in my family tree
Pickin' off leaves
Quite studiously
And no matter how polite I am
He keeps ignoring me
So I ask Uncle Joe
On the branch below
Could you please throw the monkey
From the family tree

There's a monkey
Sittin' in my family tree
Clinging to his branch
Quite obstinately
And what he did to Uncle Joe
Has really angered me
So I've got a rock
In my old slingshot
And I'm going to knock that monkey
From the family tree

There's a monkey
Sittin' in my family tree
Smiling down
So mockingly
At the way he caught the rock
And threw it back at me
So what I've done is
Got my father's gun
And I'm gonna shoot that monkey
In the family tree

There's a monkey
Sittin' in my family tree
Laughing
Quite ridiculously
'Cause every shot I took has missed
And made a fool of me
But he won't laugh long,
He'll be good and gone
When I drop this atom bomb
On the family tree

There's a monkey
Sittin' in my family tree
Looking
Very mournfully
When I ask if there's room
Up on his branch for me
And with a very sad face,
Up in outer space
I take my place beside
The monkey in the family tree